How I Get Rid of Fear, Anxiety, and Depression
BlogLeadershipMentorship | May 7 2014
It’s 5am and the sun isn’t up. I put the kettle on for coffee. All is quiet and peaceful. Except the impending doom, anxiety, and an awareness that I don’t feel motivated. How do I get rid of fear, anxiety, and depression? What’s up with that?! I’ve only been awake for 10 minutes!
Where did these feelings and thoughts come from? I saw myself standing in front of 5 characters that meet me every morning trying to tell me “who I am not”.
I’m excited to share how I gained a strategy to overcome the characters and invited some “new friends over” to gain victory and freedom in my living.
This year I dove head first into a wound from my past that I had held on to for over 30 years. It shaped my thinking and actions from a wound when I was a kid. Little did I know that this wound would be the root cause of so much anxiety, fear, and depression later on in life. This wound created a vow. I used the vow as a coping mechanism and a false sense of security. All of my own doing. I had to come to grips with this in order to gain freedom. I didn’t want this to hinder my home life with the kids and Chantel. So, I took action…
I’d like to share with you a couple techniques I’ve developed to help rid fear, anxiety, and depression.
• You get to choose how you want to feel- This entire time I thought I was a victim to my upbringing and past. I began to gain freedom when I realized and took hold of this principle: “I get to choose how I want to feel”. You might want to say that to yourself out loud. I know, it may feel a little crazy but it’s a game changer.
• You have to have a strategy- Going through life thinking that you will eventually figure it out or that things will pass with time isn’t realistic. If you like what you’ve been getting in life, keep doing what you are doing. If you don’t, step outside of yourself and take action on change. It will cost you more to stay where you are and more pain when you could just accept the fact that you can’t fix it yourself. My strategy requires that I do this sometimes hourly and sometimes by the minute. Then there are times I can go weeks without an issue. Realize that life will always contain triggers that bring these emotions up. I had to accept this reality. Those 5 characters will be around but I get to choose how I will respond. I had to stop trying to remove anything that would trigger me. It’s exhausting. Accept that the world is crazy, inconsistent, and that money isn’t the key to happiness. People will let you down and hurt you. Unexpected bills will come up etc. That’s life.
• What you believe determines your actions- The mind is where it all starts. As soon as I learned this it changed. I had to change the way I thought. Once I realized this I became giddy because I could change my life immediately. Instant healing. Instant action. Instant change. The key: I get to choose.
• Talking out loud; your affirmations of truth go a long way- Just like this post. I keep a notebook in my Evernote that I can pull up and reference when I’m getting back into old habits, beliefs, and off track. As soon as I read these out loud it shifts. It’s amazing. The key element of this strategy is to accept that your physical body might not feel the way your mental head does. To snap myself out of it I search for others in my day that need prayer, encouragement, and hope.
• You’re not going nuts. You’re normal- I used to think something was wrong with me if I had these thoughts and feelings. Far from the truth. I’m glad I’m not emotionless. I get to see the world through a lens that few get to see. I wouldn’t be in tune with my art and creativity if I didn’t see and feel these emotions. I just had to use them to my advantage. I can use this gift of thinking and seeing for me or against me. I get to choose. I renew my mind by laying down the strategy daily. It’s like medication. Most of the folks in this world are on the verge of losing it but won’t admit it. They self medicate with drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, work, and status/power. As soon as I admitted that I didn’t “have it together” is when healing and progress could start. Otherwise I would remain a poser.
• Having this condition is one of the greatest blessings in my life- If I didn’t have emotions I don’t think it would be healthy. Almost like stone cold or not feeling anything can be a sign of possible trouble. I’m glad I’m sensitive to details. Seeing the hurt and pain and suffering in the world just magnifies the glory of God’s goodness that much more. That’s a gift. Although easier said than done. It’s a process.
Misbeliefs and lies (these characters) are like mental debt. They linger and are counterproductive. They eat up time and become consuming. Let’s cast them aside and focus on what we are and who we are meant to be.
Take the effort and energy that is normally used to manage the negative and shift it to focusing on the dreams you have, the goals you want to achieve, and the lives you want to impact. Don’t listen to “what you’re not” focus on “who you are and who you are becoming”.
My biggest visual in all this is “my new friends”. I visualize myself looking at the 5 trouble makers and telling them to take a hike. I look at the other truthful friends of love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness. Their loving patience, grace, and encouragement are amazing. I can thrive on that thought throughout the day. You can also look at the people in your life and see those that charge your batteries and those that drain them.
Here are some great truths I use to remind me:
For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline. 2 Tim 1:7
Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corinthians 5:17
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2
What are some of the battles you fight mentally and do you have a strategy for victory? I’d love to hear your thoughts below by leaving a comment. Please repost and share! I’m glad you’re here!