Life being robbed by your work?
Life being robbed by your work?
I remember about 15 years ago I Introduced myself to my mentorship group and led with a testimony that consisted of my job title and what I did for a living. The entire meaning of my life was determined by my career. I had a false identity. I realized I left my wife and newborn kids out of the picture. I was so embarrassed. I was so concerned about “providing” for them that I lost them in the wake of performing. My priorities were definitely out of alignment. This rocked me to the core. I knew I needed help. Thank goodness I was in the right place with my mentor to begin the journey of recovery, discovery and strategic living.
I totally understand what it means to be busy with life responsibilities. Raising children, school deadlines, keeping the marriage thriving, building dreams and keeping up with relationships. However, the reality I have seen is that we live what we make. Everyone is tapped and the thermometer is maxed out. We don’t have any time, we are stressed out, we aren’t living our dreams and time is flying by. I am convinced that most health issues and psychological issues stem from frustration of not living as our true authentic selves.
I would like to provide a few strategies Chantel and I have embraced that have helped us.
Begin with the end in mind – Chantel and I make it a point to look at how we want the year to finish. We imagine ourselves New Years Eve and back up from there.
Be in the business of building memories – It’s so easy to listen to what culture advises for savings plans or how money should be spent on nice things and possessions. What if the year was planned in advanced based on memories not what work “allows”. I often talk to people who can’t even remember one great memory within the last 3 months or even last year. Life isn’t about working. Life is about living.
Turn dreams into realities – Goals without deadlines are just dreams. People spend a great deal vicariously living through dream boards on Pinterest and other platforms. My life changed the moment I put these trips and goals on the calendar. When you have a deadline things become real. Action builds and launches dreams.
Get on the same page – Chantel and I spend a great deal of time together with our phones and icalendars. As a couple we take date nights every week and make sure we populate the weeks, months and year with our life. If you don’t run your life it will run you. Share a calendar with your spouse.
Book yourself as a client – I’ve counseled countless entrepreneurs and leaders and they all wish they have more time. Whether it’s a book, screenplay, art piece, series of music etc. Book yourself in your calendar and guard that time. I have found that most individuals don’t have time because of a lack of boundaries and saying ‘yes’ to anything that comes their way. My most productive year was due to saying ‘no’, setting meetings for certain time and days and then booking myself as a client each day. This immediately raised my self esteem and put me in the driver’s seat of my life and time. This also stood for Chantel’s and my date nights. Everything in the week revolves around our date night.
Maybe its time for radical change – If you desire an extraordinary life it will require drastic and bold decisions. Chantel and I knew the life we wanted wasn’t the norm. Still isn’t. We wanted a life that wasn’t ran by the “system” or culture. We desired freedom. Freedom of time, freedom to travel and freedom to give. If our life is maxed there is no room or margin for new opportunity. So, some decisions might need to be put into action. Downsizing where you live, what you spend and getting life’s expenses as small as possible. This allows for extra time because it’s less work to pay for things. What would you do with extra time, extra money and more dreams? How would you spend your time?
This time on earth isn’t about working. When we do work, may we work on things that have significance and value not just success in a dollar. Busyness is a drug with no significant outcome. What if bold decisions provided you and your family a life of freedom to go where you want, how you want, when you want? Chantel and I continue to take bigger risks doing life on our terms based on what we feel called to do in our marriage, children, education and travel. Most important, these strategies got us out of a mode of focussing on self and in a position to be able to give and help others with our time, talent and resources.
I encourage you to step into bold moves and decisions. where can you downsize to actually gain freedom, time and resources?
Answer this? If you gained an extra 30 hours a week, added more revenue to your monthly living, how would you use it? How would you spend more time, money and dreams?
Please feel free to share and pass along to someone you feel would benefit. I’d love to hear from you by leaving a comment below.